ITALIAN SAL speaks: I've grown increasingly concerned about VINNIE ROSE's health and welfare. Chronic depression constipation affects nearly 39...43..I mean 97 percent of Americans. And Vinnie is clearly 97 percent an American. Forthwith the warning signs of chronic depression constipation as they applied to Vinnie.
Day 1) We doubleteamed CUPCAKE. For America. Vinnie dumps a load on her face. Also for America.
Day 12) We doubleteamed CUPCAKE. For America. Vinnie dumps a load on her face. Also for America.
Day 23) We doubleteamed CUPCAKE. For America. Vinnie does NOT dump a load on her face. "America be damned," he says.
If you recognize these signs in your friend of depression. Or constipation. Or depression constipation, please seek help. At TEAMING UP FOR GODDAMNED AMERICA. And in Vinnie's case? The cause of his depression? In all likelihood the next news item.
DESICCATED HO MILLIONAIRESS COURTNEY LOVE TO "PLAY" DESICCATED DEAD HO LINDA LOVELACE
A STRETCH. A REEEAAAALLLLL STRETCH...
LOS ANGELES (Where The Fuck Else?) -- Controversial cunt, millionaire and murderess COURTNEY LOVE will star as "Deep Throat" actress, sex slave and media darling LINDA LOVELACE in a forthcoming afterschool special about the legendary 1970s porn star entitled, YES, VAGINA, THERE IS A GODDAMNED SANTA CLAUS.
Love, who previously played the wife of pornography mogul Larry Flynt in "The People Vs. Larry Flynt," the murdering wife of murder victim KURT COBAIN, and the murderess of every tune she ever stumbled over, has agreed to appear in "Lovelace," to be written by Merritt Johnson, a Negro.
LET'S SEE COURTNEY DO THIS!!! I MEAN WITH SOMETHING OTHER THAN A CONDOM FULLA COKE
The late porn actress, real name Linda Boreman, maintained she was never paid for the 1972 movie "Deep Throat," which was banned in 23 American states, but still went on to earn approximately $600 million, every single penny of it for Conniving Guinea Productions.
Lovelace became a leading feminist and anti-porn campaigner before dying in April 2002, aged 53, after sustaining injuries in a car crash and zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz....
IF YOU WERE A VEGETABLE, WHICH ONE WOULD YOU BE? ITALIAN SAL PENS THE TERRI SCHIAVO STORY!!!
MY BALONEY HAS A FIRST NAME, IT'S T-E-R-R-I. MY BALONEY HAS A SECOND NAME, IT'S S-C-H-I-A-V-O
FLORIDA (SkullGame) -- TERRI "RED SNAPPER" SCHIAVO is reportedly being moved to Orlando’s Seaworld one county away in nearby Orange County Florida it was recently reported by AP.
In a bid to bring Terry back from her “big sleep” Doctors have come up with a potentially bigger solution.
Doctors plan to duct tape Mrs. Schiavo to one of the many Killer whales at Seaworld and then have the whale perform its regular show complete with dives, flips, flops and midair somersaults in front of a Seaworld capacity crowd. Doctors are hoping for a twofold effect: first they are hoping that the underwater mammal-vegetable connection will be enough to possibly jumpstart her stalled-out cerebral cortex and secondly, that it will shine the light on the plight of so many mush-heads across the country and around the world. Asked to elaborate the Doctors reportedly said, “shock, humor, hydro, that is: water, and the delight and amusement of onlookers has a known and proven curative effect on all manner of dunderheads, imbeciles, vegges, morons, maroons, idiots, bang brains, and work-shy individuals.
"And at the very least it will be good for a laugh or two.” Indeed.
SKULLGAME SPONSORED SKANK APPEARS IN WEST COAST PRODUCTIONS PRODUCTION & BRINGS BACK THE GOOD GOSSIP FROM SAN FERNANDO VALLEY
STEPHANIE RED: LOOKING FOR LOADS IN ALL THE RIGHT PLACES
SAN FERNANDO VALLEY (SkullGame) -- Our very own closet dwelling, porn upstart and roving reporter STEPHANIE RED went down to the San Fernando Valley in an effort to set the town on its ear…or at the very least…its ass. Doing a scene with LAUREN PHOENIX, Stephanie got us the most stunning insider GOSSIP and tells us that...
1) Lauren has a dog. Belladonna had the baby. You think that was hard-hitting news? Well hold on to your panties 'cause here comes some more,
2) While on set filming with West Coast Productions Stephanie sees actor/director BRANDON IRON. After completing her scene for Latin Booty Talk and on her way out…get this…he, being Brandon Iron, said, and we quote:
"Bye."
Also on the same sound stage (read random house in Canoga Park) Stephanie has a conversation with adult super star Pebbles, wherein Pebbles confides in Stephanie
“I am pretty big in this industry.”
When Stephanie relayed this story to us almost on cue everyone in the room said, who?
PEBBLES WHO: VERY, VERY BIG IN THE SUCKING & FUCKING DEPARTMENT
HEIDI KLUM GOES BLACK: DOESN'T GO BACK.
YEAH, BABY. ABOUT A YARD O' BLACK COCK'LL MAKE A WOMAN DO JUST ABOUT ANYTHING. YOU SEE, ONCE I GOT A BITCH, I GOT A BITCH. I GIVE HER SOME MONEY? SHE BOUND TO GO CRAZY. SO I KEEP HER LOOKING GOOD, PRETTY AND ALL THAT. BUT NOOOO DOUGH. UH UNH.
BERLIN (SkullGame) -- UberSupermodel HAUFTSBAUMFUHRER HEIDI KLUM has lost a lucrative deal with a German fashion house following her recent announcement she's accidentally on purpose pregnant with her second child.
Otto, the world's largest neo-Nazi mail-order retailer, decided to cancel its contract with Klum when bosses heard she's expecting a child with fiance and known Negro, Seal, according to Klum's dismayed father.
Gauleiter Guenther Klum, who claims his daughter's partnership with Otto would have finished by the end of 2005, if not for her partnership with said Negro's sausage says, "[Otto] has used a race-mixing clause in the contract to cancel the deal when Heidi becomes pregnant. Or consorts with a mud person."
According to a post on her Web site, Klum's own fashion line will be available via Otto until June. Despite being dropped by Otto, Klum remains the face of numerous promotions in her native Germany, including Adolph McDonald's, her Heinrich Birkenstock shoe collection and Reichfuhrer Rosner jeans.
