Red Light District

Rating: FOUR "If This is Your Bag" or MINUS FIVE "For The Rest Of Us" BUSTED NUTS

OK. This is utter depravity. If that makes you grin from ear to ear, stop reading and go buy it. You’ll be very pleased. But to me, an admitted voyeur, this was a slaughter.

I’ve been trying to come up with ways to explain how out of line this movie is. First example: You know how many porn films always try to have the one guy with the "small" dick? Or "more manageable" wang?

Yeah, well in this movie the "little" guy is Sean Michaels!

TIFFANY RAYNE: JUST ABOUT TO BE...

You might think, "well LISA SPARXXX probably could fuck a horse." Well, maybe. But most of the women they get for this flick are hobbits. I don’t mean furry feet, but I do mean these girls are 98 pounds soaking wet. Then, director Michael Stefano grabs all of his Guido* buddies [*definition: olive-skinned men with 2% body fat, muscles sculpted out of pure granite, and cocks the size of Schwarzenegger’s arms from his competitive Mr. Universe days.] Then, you and one or TWO of your friends simultaneously ream these girls to the BRINK of death. Find any hole and fill it. I swear, the only thing stopping these guys from skull fucking these girls through the eye is they already know that they’ll never fit their coffee-shop-mega-bran-muffin-excuse-for-dick-heads through the sockets. And, you can bet they already tried.

Like I said. This was a slaughter. -- BUCK "I'm Still Feeling Funny, And I Don't Mean Ha-Ha, About Watching This" LE FUCK

Buy it NOW!