Acid Rain
Rating: FOUR "Divided By Two" BUSTED NUTS
"Hey Vinnie. What the hell are you doing?"
"Wha? Me? Oh. Not much. I'm watching a goddamn porno."
"Which one?"
"Go Ahead Ream Me."
"Well, I don't really have time right now. But what's the name of the video?"
"GO AHEAD REAM ME...!!!"
"Well, OK, you asked for it. How about THIS: I ain't paying you the $200 I owe youse."
CHANEL CHAVEZ & THE FACE THAT LAUNCHED 1000 DOLLARS ... AND VARIOUS LIQUOR STORE HOLD-UPS
Yeah. The comedic possibilities are goddamned endless here. Just like this DVD which, minus the mind-roastingly perfect scenes with Sluts CHANEL CHAVEZ and ARIA, is replete with men who enjoy double anal and double vaginal much more than any two men have a right too. I sees these guys come running and I start running too: straight for the fucking FF button to get to where the glee at extended, and I do mean EXTENDED, cock-to-cock contact ain't quite so, um, GLEEFUL. So HAPPY...so, so...GAY.
Those scenes aside, a sheer 3/5ths of the goddamned video, the aforementioned good scenes ain't just good...they're Tony the Tiger great. Chanel fucks sooooooooo well I want to commit a rash of felonies to celebrate. And Aria, while her amp-age seems a skosh put-upon eventually wins us over by TAKING IT ALL -- the slaps, the spit, the cock, the ass -- with a feral longing that recalls nothing if not that W.A.S.P. record cover from the '80s: Fuck Like a Beast.
Indeed.
Oh, and in the spirit of full disclosure: I wrote the back box copy for this bitch. Yeah. I'm that goddamned good. -- VINNIE ROSE
Buy It NOW!
