YO VINNIE,

A good friend of mine traveled to Thailand a couple of years back and secretly videotaped himself having sex with a cute local. He's married now with kids but I know that when he is home by himself he pulls out this videotape and beats off to it. Is this fucked up? (No, its NOT me.)--A.J., San Francisco, CA

Dear You're An Idiot: I'll take this moment to quote the immortal Fred Blassie.

When you were born your parents were happy.

Your father wanted a boy, and he was happy.

Your mother wanted a girl, and SHE was happy.

That is to say, what the fuck is your problem? Are you a man or a mouse? I mean it sounds like this occurred before dude was even married and you'd like to guilt him into twisting himself more completely into the stragulating bounds of unholy matrimony by limiting the last free voice of sexual expression open to him: jerking off?!?!

Fuck YOU.

And even if he WAS married when he filmed it, the damage is already done and why the hell should he not be enjoying and spending freely the wages of sin?!?

Any married man you know deserves all manner of sympathies and not fairweather friends like you who'd squeeze the fucking joy out of, well, out of something with a lot of joy in it.