YO VINNIE!
During a recent hiatus with my boyfriend, I met someone else. I went out on several dates with him and eventually found myself in a rather intimate situation. Because I still loved my boyfriend and things weren’t really resolved, I decided not to take it too far with this new friend. However, he was a good kisser and one thing was beginning to lead to another. At a crucial point, I remembered a hand-job technique that I read about. I performed it and in practically four strokes, it worked like a charm. The problem is now I can never be in his presence without him insisting that I provide him with the special hand job! He gets very upset if I don’t give it to him or if I don’t have time to see him. He’ll keep begging for it until I can’t take it anymore. He has only asked once to have actual intercourse. But, he came before I could say no! We were partially disrobed and he just ejaculated! I didn’t think 30 year old men could just shoot off without any direct stimulation to the penis. In general, he’s a really nice person, but his proclivity for my special hand job is giving me carpal tunnel syndrome (even though he usually ejaculates in less that a minute or two!). So VINNIE, do you think he has a physiological or psychological problem? Should I stay away from him? Is this just too weird or what?—Cherry, Pearl City, Hawaii

Cherry Cherry Bang Bang: Listen baby. When a man and a woman come together to love like we love that love that we love so much it can only lead to one thing [SHUT UP. FUCKING SHUT UP…I’M WORKING IT HERE!!!] and right now that is, YOU right back to ME. So we can experience the joy of sharing that which we call love and love to share that which we call life. I’m serious baby. I need you. Please contact me.

But to answer your question: there is no such thing as PREmature ejaculation.