I WUV YOU MOMMY!!!

MOTHERFUCKER!!!

We spend a lot of time on the fucking web. A lot. And for every peak experience a la STOP PRISON RAPE or CUDDLE PARTY, that is, sites that push you right up to the crumbling fucking edge of the horror, the horror, there's a site like this: a site whose raison d'etre is to coax, in the most painfully obvious way, YOUR load out of YOUR nutsack.

Ho. Hum.

It's like going to hockey game to actually watch a hockey game. We mean who the FUCK does that kind of shit?!?!

So we're going through this site, haphazardly looking for something, anything, or damned near anything to coax the cock outta the pocket and we're almost to the point of abandoning-hope-all-ye- who-have-entered-here until we see the above-pictured slut.

Such said-like slut who we just, as luck would have it, sausaged our very last time in Miami.

Jesus fucking Christ.

Do you realize what this means?!?!

After viewing more porn than ED MEESE in this fucking lifetime we've actually attained the kind of It's A Small World synchronicity in the midst of this site that purports to feature MIDDLE AGED women [yeah, if they only expect to live until they're fucking SIXTY!!!] auditioning for the pleasure and the privilege of getting pasted by penises belonging to men for whom unemployment is not a choice, it's a calling. And beyond this it means we've either been doing it too long OR that the world is in the grips of an exponential increase in fuck sluts and those that would ply their trade on the working backs of such like said fuck sluts, like us, are due for a windful of absolutely Diddy-esque proportion.

Translation: well worth the price of goddamned admission, especially as the price of goddamed admission is far lesser than the $300 I paid to poke her in the first place.