YO VINNIE,
Is it wrong to pose as a Female-to-Male Transsexual in order to get laid? I ask because I have done just that. I found her on Craigslist. She was in the No Strings Attached Pavilion. At first I thought it was just a goof but next thing I know I was telling her about me always leaving my pants on and using a special device attached to my cock to make fucking work. We're going to meet in a few days but I have started to have ethical qualms. Is this wrong? -- R.S. (by email)

OHHHH....SO THIS IS WHAT A REAL FAKE COCK LOOKS LIKE...WOOOWWW...

Dear JUDY BLUE EYES: No. make that FUCK no. If I have to count the number of times I had told women I was 1) gay, 2) a virgin, 3) greek, 4) a lumberjack, 5) sometimes all of the above JUST to get laid, well I'd still be fucking counting. You wanna give a fuck about ethics? Get thee to a fucking nunnery. You wanna get some pussy? Well you might also get thee to a nunnery, HOWEVER, there IS a catch and it's extra-clerical: have you ever given any serious thought to what a woman whose ultimate fantasy is Frankenstein would fucking look like? Have you considered that "she" might even, in a turn of colossal perverseness, be a male-to-female transsexual?!?! Have you rendered at all each and every one of the horrifying possibilities once you start fucking with scalpels and steroids? Well you should, my friend, you should.