Yo Vinnie,
My man won't eat pussy. I've tried cajoling, bribing and even the point blank approach of asking him direct. And he's done it every now and then, but it's like he's doing me a favor. So therefore it sucks. Suggestions?--M.T. (by email)

THERE'S ALWAYS ONE GUY THAT'S GOT TO GO TOTALLY FUCKING OVERBOARD WITH SHIT. THAT GUY IS THIS ONE. RELAX, COWBOY.

Dear Mrs. Allergic To Cats: Dump this motherfucker. Best and simplest advice I ever gave. I mean why is it that women will suffer with substandard sex for years and years and years and then need like a personal audience with OPRAH before they figure out that "yes, it IS, that goddamned important." And to the guys out there who are making faces like JAMIL, listen, try to square yourself with hearing these words --"I will never ever suck your cock. Ever."-- and see how that sits with you. I mean shit, look, if she could do it herself she would, but she can't, so help the fuck out. It's totally worth it. Especially if by worth it you mean "I Like Blowjobs."

And that would be GETTING them and not GIVING them, MR. DAVE DIETRICH. I mean if you're reading this.