And lest they be forgotten SKULLGAME would like to take a collective moment out to pay a red, white and blue memorial tribute to all the little people that make America the free fucking country it is by pulling our planes around.
PLEASE STAY SEATED UNTIL THE FUCKING MIDGETS COME TO A COMPLETE STOP
JUDGE RULES THAT "GAY" NOT LIBELOUS. TOM CRUISE ENRAGED
BUT BEFORE THE RAGE: CRUISE RECEIVING A GAY AWARD FOR NOT BEING GAY FROM A KNOWN GAY MAN WHO SEEMS TO HAVE A GREAT RESPECT FOR JAPANESE OPERA
BOSTON (SkullGame) -- Stating that someone is a homosexual, or a cocksucker, or even a homosexual cocksucker, or even a fucking backpacking in the ass cracking homosexual cocksucker does not libel or slander them, particularly in light of new court decisions granting homosexuals more rights, a federal judge has ruled to TOM "I'M NOT GAY" CRUISE's chagrin.
The ruling by U.S. District Judge Nancy Gertner came as she threw out lawsuits by TOM "I'M NOT GAY" CRUISE against SKULLGAME, as well as a former "boyfriend" of pop singer and occasional homosexual MADONNA who claimed he was libeled because his gay name appeared in a photo caption in a book about Madonna — under a picture of Madonna walking with a homosexual man.
"In fact, a finding that such a statement is defamatory requires this court to legitimize the prejudice and bigotry that for too long have plagued the homosexual community," she wrote in her opinion Friday, right before she dismissed everyone and advised them to "now go home and suck away. Or whatever it is that you people do."
ANOTHER ITALIAN SALVO...
AN OPEN LETTER TO LINDSAY LOHAN:
THIS IS LINDSAY LOHAN, NOT SOME RANDOM SLUT
Hello Ms. Lohan. Let me introduce myself if I may. My name is Italian Sal...of the Skullgame Sal’s.
Anyhow, I am writing this letter in hopes that you or one of your many fans will read this and that somehow my request will somehow make it to you. First and foremost I consider myself one of your many fans. Hell, I have been a fan since...since...well since you wore that little dress in your movie "Mean Girls."
Well now that I think of it, I guess I am less a fan and more someone you gave an erection to, but let's not get stuck on semantics and word games, you bitch. My dear Ms. Lohan, I would hope that you would consider a career in adult films in the not-so-distant future. After seeing you in "Mean Girls" and achieving the aforementioned erection my eagerness for seeing you on your back with your knees pinned up near your ears has literally reached a fever pitch.
THIS IS SOME RANDOM SLUT, NOT LINDSAY LOHAN...SEE WHAT THE FUCK WE MEAN?!?!
I would hope that you would consider my heartfelt note, if not for me, then do it for America, because if you don’t...well, I shudder to think this, well if you don’t, the terrorists will have already won.
Thank you and may God continue to bless America.
SCARLETT JOHANSSON TAKES A BREAK FROM BENICIO'S TORO TO SLUICE LUCY
EVERYBODY WANTS TO LOOK LIKE A PORNSTAR BUT NOBODY WANTS TO SUCK THE COCK
NEW YORK (SkullGame) -- The 19-year-old bombshell sexy, sex sex starlet SCARLETT JOHANSSON stunned drinkers at a posh bar — by sharing some tongue gobbling with gorgeous actress and fellow blonde beauty TARA SUBKOFF, at New York’s ultra-hip Hiro lesbianatorium.
Onlookers told how sultry Tara, 30, led Scarlett off to a corner before kissing her full on the mouth. Tara, who also heads her own fashion label, is known for provocative and some would say desperate antics.
Scarlett — who has just landed a fucking Laughing Satan $4 million modelling deal as the face of design house Louis Vuitton — is also notorious for HER daring sex acts. She once confessed to sucking sausage in a hotel elevator with movie hunk Benicio del Toro, 37. At least she thinks that was Benicio del Toro.
SCARLETT THE HARLOT & TARA TIME: EVERYBODY WANTS TO LOOK LIKE A LESBIAN BUT NOBODY WANTS TO MUNCH THE RUG
And Tara, not to be outslutted, once stripped naked for a scene in a 2002 TV movie Teenage Caveman. She set up her fashion house Imitation of Christ after accusing Hollywood film-makers of churning out rubbish like Teenage Caveman.
Her screenprint evening gowns are famed for their bizarre slogans — including "Sincerity is the new vulgarity," "We need enemies," and "I suck sooooo bad."
