Yo Vinnie,
A friend of mine asked me to set him up with a woman I know through work. My friend is a great guy, once you get to know him, but, well, he’s a little odd. And this woman is really a 10, way out of his league. Should I attempt the set up (my friend requested a small dinner party) or break it to him that he doesn’t have a snowball’s chance in hell?--M.M. (by email)

SKULLGAME GUIDE TO TELLING WHEN SHE LIKES YOU: LESSON #2

Dear Chuck Woolery: God saves us from the fucking do gooders. So YOU'RE going to do your friend a FAVOR by breaking it to him gently that he's a FUCKING LOSER? With friends like you who the fuck needs back-stabbing fucking faggots around? Listen, I know, I know there exists that semi-informal rating and ranking system that everybody likes to pretend doesn't exist but really does that has the hot chicks pairing off with the hot guys and the losers are left to fight over the spoils. But it's discontinuities in that system that we all should live for. Those days when you win the lottery. Exceptin' there's no CHANCE to any of this as the victor will always be the one that realizes that we are all just pieces of meat and that there is no piece of meat better than any other piece of meat. Who am I? Who the fuck am I? I'm the guy that turns the TV up when the hot bitch is talking because "I can't hear the game." THAT'S who the fuck I am. So set up the dinner, leave your friend alone, and then fuck off. Simple.