Mack Avenue Skullgame
Vinnie Pick of the Week
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08.25.08
DOWN ON THE UPSIDE

Yo Vinnie,
If you have erectile difficulties is the woman on top position going to make things worse? -- Duh? (by email)

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REAL DREAD. AND MORTAL TERROR.


Dear ROY ROGERS: The woman on top position, also known as the COWGIRL or the HILLARY CLINTON, usually has the man on his back, hands behind his head, smoking a cigarette, staring at the ceiling and wondering why he ain't fucking better looking women. If she turns around and faces his feet this is known as the REVERSE COWGIRL or the REPUBLICAN as it's a perfect prelude to woman-directed ass fuckage or the maintaining if the illusion that you're fucking a congressional page. Back in the '60s this position was like some big feminist deal because it meant that "women were taking control," apparently of your cock and the load therein. Now it either means you're fucking tired of trying to figure out what exact fuck pace best suits her and are eager to get back to doing whatever you were doing prior to this detour to Loadville, or she wants to see if you're man enough to let her take control without falling asleep while she is doing so.

But to your question regarding the hidden dark side of the COWGIRL and our medically unsupported answer: Yes.

That is: yes gravity can be a factor in maintaining a full on hard on. While you have a greater access to the parts of her body that are nice to look at, or horrible to look at depending on what pig you happen to be banging, you also have her 110 or 240 pounds bearing down on your approx. 5 to 10 inch cock and your cock doesn't stand a chance.

Give it a few shakes and switch to a workable compromise: you SITTING and her sitting on you and your cock. She controls the action, the upper half of your body and gravity keep your cock well supplied with life giving fluids and you can watch the TV over her shoulder.

Problem fucking solved.


 


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