REAL COUPLES FUCKING, EH?

SO REAL...IT HAPPENS TO ME ALLLLLLL THE GODDAMNED TIME

You know I know that the dirty little secret with this dirty big business is that we're all supposed to turn a blind eye to whatever delivery vehicle you employ to carry your semen from sac to sock.

Yup. We're just supposed to go for the okey-doke and because we're all so in on the joke we're laughing with us and not AT us while we jerk to the latest set up: Old Beaver Cleavers, Street Suck Stories, whateverthefuck.

However, there comes a time when somebody, like somebody will, goes just a little too fucking far and then you got this: VINNIE all fezzed the fuck up.

Why?

Well. I'll tell you why: because when I go to a site that claims to feature REAL and FUCKING and COUPLES I want to see the people out there who I see when I go to sex clubs. The Day Later, Dollar Shorter, Few Pounds Over, Bored To Fuck With Fucking Each Other couples. You know the ones that don't ALSO happen to make porno movies like half the people on this site.

Wait, wait, I got it. It's all coming to me now...why don't we do a site called REAL FUCKING GENIUSES OF HELSINKI and we can get SATIVA ROSE to star in. It'll be great.

No. No it won't. Franchises live and die on premises and if yours is a shitty fucking transparently bullshitty one then we hate you.

Pure and simple.