Yo Vinnie,
Why do bitches always go for assholes. Today is Sunday. I went out last night and was talking to this bitch and got swooped on by this cowboy hat-wearing, alligator shirted fucking L.A. Colin Ferrell badboy prick cocksucker. Who wasn't any better looking than me. I gotta be a rapist fucking felon to get noticed these days or what?--Finishing Last (by email)

SOME GAVE ALL. AND ALL GAVE SOME. AND THEN AGAIN SOME JUST SAT IN THE CRUISER COLLECTING TITTY MEMENTOS.

Dear OFFICER E. BROOKS from the LOS ALTOS PD: Glad to know that our thin blue line, Northern California's finest are reading SKULLGAME. And even writing in. Asking questions. Asking me to withold their name and such. It means a lot to all of us what with you all being fucking American heroes and all. But to your question. First of all know that if you were in front of me now instead of hassling Mexicans over at the 7-11, I'd be slapping your fucking face like Brando did to Johnny Fontaine in The Godfather. What the hell are you crying about? Boo fucking hoo. Bar Ho's don't like me. I lost one really super special nice pretty lady one to the evil fashion adept homosexual who strangely enough seemed to want to fuck the really super special nice pretty lady. Listen to yourself. A bad dancer blames his shoes and YOU, sir, are a SHITTY dancer. So to answer your question: yes. Yes, you do need to be a fucking rapist felon to get noticed these days. I mean it's worked wonders for me. Roger-out, Adam 12. Crybaby. Prick.