THIS version of SkullGame is being underwritten by FUN STUFF STEROIDS: The Steroids to take when you're having fun. And stuff.
WE SURE AS HELL DON'T, HOPPY. WHICH IS WHY WE'RE CONVINCED THAT YOU'LL BE 100 % SATISFIED WITH THE ONLY KIND OF MUSCLE BUILDING ADDITIVE THAT WILL PICK YOU UP, WHILE IT SMOOTHS YOU DOWN...IMMEDIATELY PRIOR TO FIRING YOU OUT OF THE FUCKING CANNON OF BLINDING RAGE FOR SLIGHTS BOTH REAL & IMAGINED.
AND SPEAKING OF STEROIDS: "ACTRESS" MICHELLE "CHUCHIFRITO BANDITO" RODRIGUEZ DESCRIBES RECENT ARREST AS A PRODUCT OF NOT "DRUNKEN" RAGE, BUT GOOD OL' FASHIONED "ROID" RAGE, BEGS FOR ACQUITTAL...HER ATTORNEY SLAMS BINDER SHUT, WONDERS WHY HE EVEN GOT OUT OF BED TODAY.
"WHO THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU'RE TALKING TO?!?!?!?"
HAWAII (SkullGame) -- "Lost" actress MICHELLE RODRIGUEZ has blamed her drunk driving and subsequent drunk driving bad behaviors, NOT on tequila shooters and drunk driving, but on her raggedly applied use of steroids.
The star was sentenced to serve five days in a Hawaiian jail Wednesday, after pleading guilty to a drunk-driving while amped to the fucking gills on monkey glands and Sustanon charge.
The actress insisted in court the steroid injections she had been taking twice monthly to treat allergies to "dust and cockroach resin" made her "manic." "Manic" about "dust and cockroach resin," mostly. She "developed" the "allergies" upon arriving in Hawaii last year, where she films her hit TV show.
During her December arrest for drunk driving in Hawaii, she screamed and yelled at officers until every vein on her well-muscled forehead stood out in bas relief, at one point daring them to "put a gun to my head and shoot me. Your bullets CANNOT harm THUNDRA!!!"
She had to be carried into the police station because she sat down in the station garage and refused to stand up, according to a police source she had said, "Don't make me angry Mr. McGee. You wouldn't like me when I'm angry."
She later added in court, "I wasn't right in my head. None of that verbal behavior was directed toward them. It was directed toward myself. Yes, myself. Myself and all the dirty Jews that are me. In my head. Eggs don't like bacon and you know if your turkey has a hat you BETTER not bring it home to your mother."
SHOOTER-IN-THE-FACER AMY FISHER HIGH ON "E" WHILST SHOOTING IN THE FACE OF HER GUINEA BOYFRIEND'S WIFE; THIS DESPITE "E" BEING DESCRIBED AS "LOVE DRUG." UNLESS THEY MEAN "LOVE SHOOTING-EX-GUINEA-BOYFRIEND'S-WIFE-IN-THE-FACE-DRUG."
"AGH...O...I MEAN......SHIZNIT!!! RUGGLES....MY EYES, MY EYES!!! I LOVE THEM!!! ALL 10!!!"
NEW YORK (SkullGame) -- The "Ecstasy" made her do it. AMY FISHER says she was "strung out" on the club drug when she shot her boyfriend's wife in the face in 1992.
"I was using Ecstasy, a lot of Ecstasy. A whole lotta lotta lotta Ecstasy. In fact, so much Ecstasy that well, let's just say this: a lotta Ecstasy," Fisher, nicknamed the "LONG ISLAND LOLITA," tells Entertainment Tonight in an interview that was to air Thursday. "I had no control. I had a lotta lotta lotta Ecstasy. But no control. Ecstasy, yes. Control? Not so much."
Fisher was 16 when she visited the home of her much-older lover, JOEY BUTTAFUOCO, a car mechanic on New York's Long Island, and shot his wife, Mary Jo, as she answered the door. The drug made her feel "stronger and confident about shooting soccer moms in the face," she says. "I just did something totally irrational...like forgetting my glow stick," Fisher says. "Believe me, rational people don't go to do something like that in the middle of the day withOUT a glowstick. It's just insane. Without the glow stick thing."
She served seven years in prison for the attack.
THE DOCTOR IS IN: ITALIAN SAL PACINO, PhD, MD, MS, BA, BRINGS MEDICINE BACK TO WHERE IT BELONGS: THE HAZILY DEFINED NETHER REGIONS OF NEAR-LEGAL EXPERIMENTAL "PRACTICE".
"WHAT AM I DOING? HAHAHAHA...DON'T YOU KNOW?" SAL PACINO ABOUT TO INSTALL WHAT HE DESCRIBES AS "AN ACCELERATOR KNOB."
When you say "Practice Medicine" define "Practice."
I mean one of the worst things about there no longer being a Taliban in Beheadistan, is the fact that there is no place for Medical Hobbyists like myself to practice medicine freely, unrestrainedly, and joyously, like God intended. Okay, before everyone loses their collective minds let me explain what a medical hobbyist is. A medical hobbyist is someone with no education and/or training in the medical field performing procedures once done only by doctors, for example: draining cauliflower ears, pulling out in-grown toe nails and my favorite: stitching sucking chest wounds.
I give no medical advice, can't prescribe medicine, however as far as application is concerned, I feel I am a damn good medical hobbyist.
I wonder if I can go to India and practice. All their doctors are practicing medicine here so they must be desperate. I was thinking Somalia for a while but that place is a bit lawless even for me... That being said, take this as my first official advertisement and/or services offered post. If anyone, and I mean anyone, is in need of a cauliflower ear drained, in-grown toe nail removed or as I said before, a sucking chest wound stitched, please let me know. I think I can lance a boil and or pack an abscess, too... of course I can't be sure as I have done neither one of those particular procedures, however I imagine they would be quite easy...I think...
VILLAGE PEOPLE COP ARRESTED FOR CRACK, SUSPICIOUS YMCA FIRE
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ROGUE COP VICTOR WILLIS WANTS YOU...TO HELP HIM PURCHASE SOME HUBBA.
REDWOOD CITY (SkullGame) -- The original police officer from the Village People disco group is back in jail for his long-delayed sentencing on drug and other charges, after a real officer stopped his car and found him with cocaine, authorities said Monday.
Victor Willis, 54, was arrested Sunday after the car in which he and a woman were driving was stopped by South San Francisco Officer Ivan Delacruz on Airport Boulevard. Neither Willis nor the woman had proper identification, both had cocaine, and Willis had drug paraphernalia and said on arrest, "you can't stop the music," Lt. Jeff Azzopardi said.
Willis co-wrote such hits as "YMCA" and "In the Navy" for the Village People in the 1970s. He left the group in 1980, and was convicted 10 years later of possessing drugs. Last July, Willis was arrested in Daly City for possessing cocaine. He agreed to a plea bargain in September that would have resulted in a prison term of no more than 16 months. But he never showed up for sentencing and has been wanted ever since.
In possibly related news, investigators are asking for the public's help in identifying a young man who, if he ever felt down, went to stay at the YMCA...where he was later found dead, an apparent victim of fun and suspicious circumstances last week. The case of John Doe No. 9 -- described as a 25-year-old man -- was to be turned over to the homicide detail for follow-up investigation today. He was found last Friday at 7:15 a.m. lying in the eighth-floor hallway of the Shih Yu-Lang Central YMCA Hotel at 220 Golden Gate Ave. in the Tenderloin neighborhood.
He was 5-foot-8, 145 pounds, with green eyes and short red hair. He was dressed in a black long-sleeve shirt, blue jeans and black Converse All-Star sneakers.
Anyone with information about his identity is asked to call the medical examiner's office at (415) 553-1694.
