Platinum X

Rating: THREE & A HALF "In A Galaxy Far, Far Away: Star Whores!!!" BUSTED NUTS

What the fuck is that sticking out of the lovely JAYNA OSO's meat pit?

Her innards? An intestine shaped confectionery product?

WHAT IS: ALL OF THE ABOVE, ALEX?

Is it fuck. It’s an intestinal dessert-shaped sex toy is what it is. Jayna obviously wants to have her cake, guts and sex toy and insert it too. Over and over and over again, by all appearances. Yup, this flick features sluts of every color and creed, doing what your mother told you you ought not to do. No, not intravenous drugs, nor talking to old men in the park. Self abuse. Which is of course exactly what keeps SKULLGAME functioning. Well, that and drug abuse. Whilst a DVD containing footage of the SKULLGAME staff masturbating would most likely scar people for life, the girls here do the opposite and enrich your life. And when I say "enrich" I mean stain your clothes and give you cramp of the hand.

The premise is simple and a tad repetitive: few minutes of chit chat then down to the poking and stroking. Most of these girls are of a good standard, no total pigs, but some better than others. VANESSA BLUE is a hands down pro at this game, talking into the camera, talking to YOU. True, you could open beer bottles with her overbite, but what do you want ME to do about it? She is slutty, foul mouthed and has MASSIVE goiters. Good old Jayna deserves a nod for fitting the aforementioned object all the way up her chuff. Well done Jayna. Not so good is the freaky faced ALEX DIVINE. When she smiles, you can hear a thousand camera lenses cracking in unison.

If you like this sort of thing, then you will struggle to find a better example of chicks doing themselves. Who knows, studying this flick and seeing just how women do it might stop your girl thinking you are a selfish loser.

But I doubt it. -- ENGLISH BOB

English Bob

Buy it NOW!