SURPRISE.....MOTHERFUCKER!!!!
In a departure from our regularly scheduled fucking of celebrity ass, interracial facials, and caustic commentary on crap cinema and le esthetique du pathetique, we at MACK AVENUE SKULLGAME have fallen down a freaky fucking hole BECAUSE YOU ASKED FOR IT. Yeah we read all of your letters. The question remains though: are you laughing AT us or are you laughing WITH us?--VINNIE ROSE
TWO TRANNIES, FOUR BALLS, A JUG OF WINE AND THOU
Going to the subway on 14th street in Lower Manhattan one day we saw these fucking trannies fighting. Big ol' ass-kicking fucking Puerto Rican trannies beating the shit out of each other with platform shoes. FOUR hundred pounds of fist-fighting fury in pigtails. FUCK YEAH!
And 10 years later here we are in Vegas. Different city, different trannies, different story.
"So, you want to meet my trannies?" The speaker was Robert from Digital G Entertainment.
"No no no no no no no...."
"Oh. OK. I'll bring them right over then." And so he did.
I HAVE A COCK....AND I VOTE!!!
Jesus, a close encounter with a transsexual, what does it mean? What could it mean? Exactly what it sounds like. STEELY ROB, ITALIAN SAL and CORNHOLIO stood there and drew straws and CORNHOLIO drew the first and shortest straw. And the rules of engagement were as follows: the questions should be asked NO DIFFERENTLY than they would for ANY other pornstar we ever talk to.
So here for your reading pleasure: “What Cornholio doesn’t know is…”
SkullGame: Hi. It’s very nice to meet you.
ALLANAH STARR: Thank you baby. It’s good to meet you too.
SG: Yes you are very tall. You two are probably the tallest women here today.
AS: Thank you poppy, I AM a big girl [laughing].
SG: Okay, so we have this little format we follow where we ask FIVE questions. In my hand I have two lists. One I call the red pill, the other I call the blue pill. So it's like in the Matrix. Choose!
AS: I want red.
SG: Who do you like working with best?
AS: Her. GIA DARLING.
SG: Are you saying that because she's standing here?
AS: No, not at all, I say that because she is nice and beautiful and easy to get along with.
SG:How long do you plan on staying in the industry?
AS: As long as my looks hold out, when they go. I got to get out… [Laughing]
SG: [Laughing] What will you do when you get out?
AS: Well I have a website and I have lots of content and I'm continuously adding to it.
SG: What's funnier: a monkey in a tuxedo, or a midget?
AS: [Laughing] Ah, a monkey in a tuxedo. I have to give the PC answer to that one.
SG: [CORNHOLIO stares at this question for a long time before finally speaking] How...much...would they have to pay you to make a movie with me?
AS: TEN DOLLARS!
STEELY ROB & ITALIAN SAL: WE'LLL GIVE YOU $20!!!!
SG: [CORNHOLIO stares at them for like a minute until it gets uncomfortably quiet] Now if you could have a maxed out Visa or a Meth habit, which would you have?
AS: Oh, it would have to be the maxed out Visa.
SG:Gotdamn...We can’t get anyone to choose the Meth habit. Thank you so much for you time. [CORNHOLIO now turning his attention to the other statuesque Amazonian beauty] So now it’s your turn; your friend picked red so that leaves you with blue. Are you ready?
AND THEN YOU WOKE UP
GIA DARLING: Yes.
SG: If you had to give money to some bullshit charity, which would it be?
GD: That’s easy. I would give money to PETA.
SG: Ah, good answer. So you don’t wear any leather or eat meat or anything like that?
GD: Oh no, I am not a fanatic or anything like that. I just think that they do really important work and that’s the charity I would donate money to.
SG: If you were in a band which instrument would you play?
GD: If I were in a band I would play the Piano, because I like to use my hands. [Laughing]
ITALIAN SAL LOOKING LIKE A MAN WHO WON A BET
SG: Shrimp fried rice or Pork fried rice?
GD: That’s an easy one too. I'm allergic to shrimp so it would have to be pork fried rice.
SG:Where are you staying in Vegas?
GD: [winking at Cornholio] I am at the Venetian…
SG: Hitler: misunderstood?
GD: [Laughing] Why couldn’t I get the Midget and the Monkey question? I don’t know, I guess everyone is sort of misunderstood in one way or another. My answer is a monkey in a tuxedo.
MR. T IN A TELEVISED RANT TO BRITNEY SPEARS: J'ACCUSE!!!!
"SHE'S SPORTING A SAUSAGE AS SURE AS MY FIRST NAME IS MR."
HOLLYWOOD (SkullGame) -- In a lather over the recent announcement that IRON MICHAEL TYSONWITZ would be playing his signature role in the soon-to-be-made version of THE A TEAM: THE MOVIE, the erstwhile MR. T went on a televised rant wherein he not only lashed out at IRON MIKE in a profanity-laced diatribe but heaped abuse and accusations of transsexualism on pop performer BRITNEY SPEARS.
"A SET OF TEABAGS BIGGER THAN MINE!?!?! WHAT THE HELL IS THIS WORLD COMING TOO?!?!?!" NOTE: CORNHOLIO OFFERING MS. SPEARS A HELPING HAND.
A spokesman for Ms. Spears was baffled at the outburst and refused to either confirm or deny a Spearsian set of stones.
